A Love That Cares: Jay T’s Heroic Journey as a Caregiver and Partner
When Neuroendocrine Cancer UK introduced the Hero Awards in 2024, they wanted to celebrate the quiet heroes. The caregivers, friends, and supporters who walk alongside patients every step of the way. Among those honoured was Jay T, recipient of the Family, Friend & Supporter award, whose unwavering commitment to his partner Sarah moved not only the judging panel, but everyone who heard their story.
Jay’s journey is one of quiet resilience, deep love, and extraordinary strength. All qualities that shine brightly in a life that has been anything but easy.
Love in the Face of Loss
Jay and Sarah met during lockdown; a time already steeped in uncertainty. Jay had recently lost his fiancée to pancreatic cancer. So when Sarah, who was diagnosed with neuroendocrine cancer in 2016, began to fall for him, she was scared to share her health history.
“I was nervous to tell him in case he didn’t want to be with someone affected by cancer again,” Sarah admitted in her nomination. “I needn’t have worried. He didn’t care. He said it just made him want to care for me even more.”
Just two years before meeting Sarah, Jay lost his sight overnight after suffering two strokes in the space of six weeks. Along with the blindness came a permanent brain injury. It was a life-altering experience, one that could have led anyone to retreat inward, focus solely on survival.
But not Jay.
“Even if I’m tired myself, Sarah’s needs come first. That’s marriage.”
From the outside, it might seem impossible for someone living with sight loss and the aftereffects of a brain injury to also care for someone with cancer. But Jay does it every single day, lovingly, and without complaint.
“My bowel surgery in 2016 has had a massive impact on my life,” says Sarah. “I can suffer with chronic diarrhoea for months at a time. He’s there to hold my hand while I scream in pain. He comforts me every year on the anniversary of my diagnosis. He’s with me at every appointment, pushing through his own fears travelling on buses and trains to reach the hospital all while still adjusting to his new normal.”
Jay takes everything in his stride. Whether it’s navigating Sarah’s symptoms, coping with her diagnosis of Functional Neurological Disorder (FND), or ensuring there’s always a toilet nearby when they go out, he plans around her needs, never making her feel like a burden.
“Caregiving wasn’t a decision I had to make,” he says. “It was just a natural part of our relationship.”
Strength Behind the Tears
Behind Jay’s quiet strength is someone who has fought many battles, both physical and emotional. He’s learned to manage his feelings, often finding private moments to release the weight of the day.
“If I was feeling sad or down, I’d wait until Sarah had gone to bed and have a bit of a cry, so as not to burden her,” he shares.
It’s this emotional sensitivity, paired with his fierce protectiveness, that makes Jay so special.
And he’s passionate about raising awareness, too. “I wish people would stop saying it’s a ‘good cancer.’ Cancer is cancer. It changes people’s lives,” he says. “Neuroendocrine cancer is unpredictable. One minute you’re fine, the next you’re not. A bit more empathy and flexibility would go a long way.”
The Moment Everything Changed
When Jay received the email telling him he had won a Hero Award, he was stunned.
“What the hell?” he laughed. “Why me? I’m not that special. I just do what needs to be done.”
But Sarah and everyone who’s heard their story knows he is.
When the award arrived in the post, Jay thought it was another of his late-night purchases. “I opened it up, I saw it, and everything started in the kitchen. I screamed and made her jump! You’d think I’d just won the FA Cup!”
The award now sits proudly on display in their home – daily reminder of the love, care, and strength that defines Jay.
A Love That Goes Both Ways
Though Jay received the award, he’s quick to say it’s not a one-way street.
“For all the things I do for Sarah, she does so much for me. Her and her daughter Millie mean the world to me. They’re the most important things in my life.”
Their relationship is a beautiful partnership, one built on deep mutual care, honesty, and a shared understanding of life’s fragility.
A Message That Matters
Jay’s story isn’t just about him. It’s a call to look closer at the unseen struggles of caregivers, the misunderstood realities of living with neuroendocrine cancer, and the strength that blooms even in the hardest of times.
He may say he’s not extraordinary, but we beg to differ.
Jay, you are a hero. And more than that you are proof that love, in all its forms, really can conquer anything.